There are things I look back on as a yoga teacher that I just wouldn’t do again. Classes I wouldn’t teach. Events or promo I would say no to. Like no matter how many times people ask John Vitarelli & I to do glow in the dark yoga again I just can’t do it. It was actually really cool 10 years ago, but thinking of it now makes me cringe. Ugh. Trappings.
Hopefully I’ve grown as a teacher. Hopefully I don’t need to put on a big show to prove that I have something to offer. And hopefully I would make my teachers proud. That’s important to me.
I have watched teachers start out brand new and rise to popularity like a rocket ship!
That has never been me. I am a paper airplane. I have had moments of grace… and I have awkwardly plummeted my point into a wall.
I have gone back to the drawing board again and again… to rebuild. I am in a constant state of rebuilding.
As a studio owner though, I have to admit interesting offerings are a big part of community building, so I 100% support and even encourage teachers to come up with fresh, even weird, content to present. I agree with the people that say that things like “Class and a Glass” will bring in students who might not otherwise try a yoga class at all, BUT I always thought there was an AFTER CLASS policy on that. I’m not the boss of you, but please don’t drink during yoga. I wish it went without saying.
But if you have done yoga with beer or something like it, I’m not trying to judge you or the teacher or the studio. We’re all growing while we’re learning yoga, growing while we’re learning to teach yoga, growing while we’re learning to bring yoga into the rest of our lives.
I’ve had growing pains.
I’ve never claimed to be a “great” teacher. I aim to be, but I make mistakes, lots of them, and I will again. The second side eludes me. I am profoundly flawed. I am everything I have been called, and then some. But I deeply love yoga.
I love it so much that somehow I find an ounce of energy to climb out of my pit of self-loathing over and over again, out of the depressive state that mocks any success I might have, to make the often painful changes that are necessary for growth, apologize or stand up for myself as needed, do more studying and work on myself, and learn from my mistakes so I can do better.
I am a paper airplane. I will fly. But if you see me glide too high… by all means —
Knock Me Down Again.